Sex & The City: The Movie was a hard thing to follow but the second installment surely did okay with it, not horribly as many have come to judge.

From the very beginning, the series built itself upon new rules of television, as only HBO and Showtime can do. The show, fronted by four beautiful, middle-aged women spoke to many (gay, straight and otherwise) on the terms that fashion, sex and love do brighten up the sinister world we live in.

Sex & The City’s main character Carrie became known for her Manolo Blahniks, her raised brow, her often selfish ways and most importantly her ability to turn anything into a column worthy of uttering “I couldn’t help but wonder...” That hasn’t changed.

I have to admit, I walked into the theatre just nights ago with a different mindset than most. I had watched the movie two years ago when it premiered, yet I had been watching the entire series on DVD days before the culmination of this second film.

Realistically, there were no expectations. The only thing that had my stomach turning before the film began was the anticipation of seeing Aidan Shaw, Carrie’s best match, come back into her life. Outside of that, I expected nothing less than what the first film delivered: candy-like cinematography, great cameos and these four women doing what they do best. What that is, is highly questioned as this returning film took off.

As the film began in the lavish and awkward gay wedding, it was looking to be a different kind of film. The hairs upon my forearms stood up, and I didn’t like where it was going.

Once Liza came, sang, and scared the crap out of my musical ears, it dawned on me that this wasn’t Sex & the City, it was Realistic City, a different show I didn’t sign up to watch (or did I?).

Admittedly, I have to point out that regardless of how this film was approached, there was a little bit of rushing, that could also be connected to the film’s new theme: maturing women. Perhaps the film sped up to try and make the audience know its destination. Funnily enough, it did so in a slow manner.

Over time we have seen these women grow, yet their single status helped the malleable sex scenes and ever changing circumstances. Once married with children (or menopausing) how long can you live with sex in a city?

This film is extremely grainy, creeping out the best of me because once the film ended, I realized that these women were not the same, but why would I want them to be? The great legacy that Sex & the City leaves behind is its cutting edge, frank approach to all things sex, romance and relationships. Also, the realism that came with the years that passed from beginning to end.

The film’s greatest achievement was Bradshaw’s growth, which as nagging as it may have felt, showed that even though she has never been the marriage kind, it sneaked up on her along with the qualities that come with said territory. As did motherhood with Charlotte, the ability to let go with Miranda and Samantha’s awareness that no matter what she will always be who she has always been.

Faults within the film are palpable. There’s that gay wedding (a shirtless gay guy on the dance floor while Liza sings? Necessary? No.), its slow pace, and the show’s persistence to make Big and Carrie work (which when it comes down to it is just a personal preference).

At the end of the day, the film was an accurate transition from the last movie dealing with married life, parenthood, and aging. The only thing that created the bump in translating to audiences was the lack of introduction. The film as good as it can be, was sold under false pretenses. Although that doesn’t mean that the film didn’t achieve what it needed to, this was to push the idea that with age only comes more obstacles to surpass. And even though the sex might end up dwindling, life does go on in the city.

You will enjoy Sex and the City 2 if:

-You prefer your movies with little plot or character development
-You can completely suspend your disbelief that these women would make it out of Abu Dhabi alive
-You are easily amused by every known gay/middle east stereotype and then some
-You enjoy jokes that are neither relevant nor original ("Lawrence of My Labia"? Really???)
-You can get your total Aiden fix from the five minutes he's on screen
-You believe that Mr. Big would put up with Carrie's incessant stream of bullshit.
-You enjoy movies starring a genetically engineered cross between Veronica Lake and the Crypt Keeper.

Oh, how the mighty have botoxed. Today's release of 'Sex and the City 2' marks the slow and painful death of a much beloved franchise in my eyes. I have no doubt that throngs of women, reluctant husbands, and gay men will eagerly wait in line for this sorry waste of once fascinating characters. Success or no, the party was over for me about five minutes in.

To give you some perspective, I'm a Sex and the City fan from way back. While I recognized the shortcomings of the movie, I appreciated the fact that I was able to revisit the characters I admired so much from six years of fervent following. I don't buy for one second that this new flick is for the fans and not the critics. As a fan of the brand, I'm insulted.

This was not the Sex and the City of my adolescence. It seems that, in marriage, these women have lost their ability to intelligently dissect their dilemmas. What's most distressing is a scene where the ladies sing "I Am Woman" by Helen Reddy. What we see before us is not a group of women, but rather a group of sad looking mannequins who are blissfully unaware of their surroundings. Sounds like a charmed existence. I would rather live the events of Requiem for a Dream than suggest that the characters of this film are relatable or admirable.